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No matter who you are or what season of life you are in right now, things are stressful. Between a world pandemic and politics and current events, we are all in some way affected by what is going on in our world. And let me tell you, it is challenging. There are so many things being thrown at us at once that nobody has ever had to face before. It is difficult to decide which way is right and which way is wrong, if there even is a right or wrong way to be doing things right now. It seems like every situation is impossible. But what if it wasn’t? What if we had a response that was always, in every situation, no doubt the right one? Insert grace.
Grace can be a hard concept to define, and there are a lot of definitions out there to complete the whole puzzle of what it means to give grace. Grace is that it is okay to not be okay. Grace is the exercise of love, kindness, mercy, favor disposition to benefit or serve another (the wise words of Pinterest). Grace means that all of your mistakes now serve a purpose instead of serving shame (Brené Brown). Grace is powerful. Grace wins. Grace gives kindness even when it is hard. I think now more than ever we could all use a little more grace. Grace for both ourselves and for those around us.
I don’t know about you, but I am by far my own worst critic. I evaluate myself harshly, and hold myself to a higher standard than I hold most people around me. Rarely do I actually meet my own standards, and I am starting to realize that can be an unhealthy habit to get into. What if we started looking at ourselves in a different light? What if we started looking at ourselves through the lens of we are doing the best we can for the situation we are in right now? Nobody can ask more of us than that, and we shouldn’t expect anything more than that. If you’re doing the best you can, then you’re doing great. If you fall short of where you want to be, give yourself some grace and go from there.
Honestly, I can’t decide which is harder: giving ourselves grace at times when we may feel like we do not deserve it, or giving it to other people when we feel like they do not deserve it. It may be a naïve perspective, but if we gave out half as much grace as we give out our opinions and criticisms, we would be in a much different place. A much better place. Our first instinct should be to give grace. Everyone is going through something, and telling them they aren’t enough or that they screwed something up isn’t going to help anyone. Showing grace and kindness, though, can change everything. I truly think it can change the entire course of someone’s life.
Sometimes I think giving grace for yourself or extending it to others can be confused with making excuses for shortcomings or letting someone off the hook easier than the rest of the world thinks they deserve. That could not be further from the truth. It takes an immense amount of strength to respond to difficult situations with pure grace. It won’t happen overnight that out natural response to tough situations immediately becomes grace. It takes a lot of practice and intentionality. I have a feeling it is worth it though. I wonder what the world would look like with a little bit more grace and little bit less anger. Maybe we should find out.
Optimistic thought of the day: Look up the different definitions for grace, and find which one works best for you.